the theme is: themes
happy (belated) groundhog day to all those who celebrate
Greetings loved ones,
I got feedback from Disco on my last post that maybe my readers would appreciate some bits of context mixed into my idea soup. I’ve decided I’ll try that, and we can all see how it feels? Obviously this project is mostly just me building an echo chamber to chase the tail of my own fixations, but I am sending this to your inbox, meaning it’s a collaboration in some form. So, prepare yourself for context.
At one month(ish) into 2026, I’ve decided that the theme of this year (for me) is themes. I think my obsession with themes is a mode of embracing the absurd rather than an impulse to categorize. The themes I’m seeking/creating tend to be randomly generated and largely untethered from any collective meaning. Currently, they take the form of daily themed outfits (for myself and for no real reason), cooking themed meals (this week: spherical foods), and partaking in a weekly theme chosen by my brilliant friends Warren and Erin, who wrote down 52 concepts at the beginning of the year and put them into a website that spits out one word per week. Participants then spend the week living “in pursuit of” this word. (Last week, we pursued the divine, and I found it everywhere because I looked for it.)
I’ve also been making my friends participate in themes with me. On Sunday, Kirby and I threw a groundhog day-themed party, which was actually less of a party and more of a performance art experience. We explored themes inspired by groundhog day the concept (shadows, seasons, reincarnation) and by Groundhog Day the 1995 film starring Bill Murray (repetition, déjà vu, karmic debt).
Here’s some (extremely) random video footage from the night:
hog.mp4 - filmed by Kaz, starring Diane, Emma, Disco, Iggy, me, and Punxsutawney Phil
I love Groundhog Day for how it represents the existential dread of being stuck in a pattern. I’m deeply familiar with this feeling. My patterns show up across my life, but most notably in my relationships (platonic, romantic, familial)– in how I communicate, how I (re)act, how I avoid. I’m afraid of my patterns and how I watch them play out without stopping them. I’m afraid of asking myself whether I can’t stop them or don’t want to.
Disco encouraged me to let my patterns haunt me instead of trying to break free of them. I’m still thinking about what this means. Emma asked, “What if you let your patterns play out, and what if it doesn’t have to be bad? What if it’s good this time?” To me, that sounds like a sure path to being haunted.
Now I’m getting scared writing about my patterns. What if I invoke them! What if you witness them!
…….
I feel like this newsletter is mostly context and not a lot of substance. Maybe I’m overcorrecting. Idk! This is my echo chamber, so I guess it can literally be this random. I’d love to hear about your patterns, or what’s haunting you, or what themes you’re noticing/pursuing/embracing right now. Text me?
One last note on the divine - I learned through the grapevine last week that a friend applied for a grant to “write new prayers.” Inexplicably, Disco, who delivered this information to me, had no further details. Who is this friend writing prayers for? Why? Who’s paying for it? What are her qualifications? I don’t have answers to any of these questions. I was, however, inspired to try writing my own prayers. Here’s the one I wrote for groundhog party (as performed in hog.mp4):
I pray that we all find the mental fortitude to question our mythologies– those that we create for and about ourselves, and those that are imposed upon us.
I pray that, when we are haunted by our patterns, we are delivered the clarity and wherewithal to learn from the haunting.
I pray that, in the coming season, we each find a clarifying piece of whatever puzzle is challenging us.
I pray that we open our hearts to synchronicities, and that we chase whimsy at every opportunity, and that we bring others into our light.
Forever and ever. Amen.
~Love you all xoxo~